Facing Judgements as an Anxious and Reactive Dog Owner

Being judged has become quite normal as a reactive dog owner. I get that. Over the past two years, I’ve faced all sorts of looks and comments. I’ve become pretty good at ignoring or avoiding eye contact whenever Lucky has one of her moments. I’ve also mastered the art of apologizing and moving on with our walks. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have moments of frustration, embarrassment, or shame. I must admit, sometimes I struggle to let things go. So here I am, venting about an encounter we had over the weekend:

We were out on our walk with Dexter in the park. Knowing Lucky gets more stressed when we’re not walking alone, I made sure to keep our distance when people passed by. As a young couple approached, I walked off the trail onto the field with Lucky to create more space. They were minding their own business, and we were a few meters apart when Lucky reacted - barking and lunging at them. I stopped her immediately, but it was enough for the woman to give me a very bad look. It was the kind of look that spoke volumes without a word. Her partner joined in for a second. I thought I could somehow make amends, so I looked her in the eye and offered a genuine apology. I’m not sure if her expression remained the same or worsened, but it certainly didn’t improve, so my shame turned to anger 😩

I know I should have just let it go. Adding anything more would have only given them power over me. But I couldn’t help myself; I shouted another “sorry!”, this time with frustration, hoping for some acknowledgment. However, they didn’t even look back. All I received was a dismissive wave from the man, signaling a “whatever.”

I couldn’t shake off thoughts of them for the rest of the day. And before you say it, I know they’re not worth my energy. But that’s the toxic part of me that resents them for how they made me feel, and I couldn’t simply brush it off. I hated how I reacted and felt like I had “lost.” I should have remained composed instead of allowing my emotions to get the better of me. So, that’s my story of the day. I will let them go now 😌